The pain of losing a loved one through child-birth

By: Bunmi Sofola

IT is impossible to go through the loss of someone you love and not be deeply affected by it. I think I knew when my girlfriend died that I would never be the same again. That my views, attitudes, outlook and philosophy would be different

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Ten years on, I’m a different person to the one I would have been had she not died. And while deep in your soul you miss the person everyday, the intense pain gets less with time— either that or you understand it more and live with it—but that itself is very comforting. You have to accept and assimilate the effect of your loss into your life. Only then can you start to deal with it….”

Anayo, now in his late thirties met Flora in the bank they both worked for and got closer when they were paired together to source for funds and make contacts with important clients when the need arose. “She was a very beautiful and intelligent woman,” confessed Anayo; “and the day she agreed for us to have a relationship was the happiest day of my life.

After a few years of the most wonderful period of my life, we agreed to get married and we started looking for the ideal flat for us. By the time we found one, she was already pregnant.



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“I was really ecstatic as we made plans for the wedding and the coming baby. With the flat and the coming baby eating the chunk of our savings we decided to put the wedding plans in the cooler until after the baby arrived. Flora became even more beautiful with her advancing pregnancy.

She’d always been very self-conscious about her bum-calling it hideous. But to me, her curves were perfect. I remember vividly the night we made love and I wrote: ‘lovely wobbly great bum’ across her bum with a felt pen thinking it would wash away with her bath. She said she was hot with embarrassment when she visited her doctor the next day, and had to strip-and he could read the graffiti! Memories like that will forever be with me.



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When she went into labour, I was with her when our beautiful daughter was born. I’d scarcely left the hospital when I got a call from the office that I should come quickly. Flora had started haemorrhaging and was very weak. Within hours, she was dead— just like that.

Just when you think you couldn’t possibly be happier, fate has a way of dealing you a painful blow in the solar plexus! I just couldn’t believe what was happening to me as I looked at the peaceful face of Flora—it was as if she was sleeping.

When the shock of her death started to wear off, the pain crashed in. My whole body ached with grief and I hurt physically. And the fear! I was petrified of trying to go on without her. I didn’t know if I could—I’d never felt so alone in my life. Going back to our flat was just excruciating—everything was still there just as it always was. Her towel was still in the bathroom, and all her hair things were still strewn all over the place. Only Flora wasn’t there. And never would be again.

As we planned for her funeral, I had to make arrangements for our daughter whom I’d named after her mother. My parents died a long time ago but Flora’s mother, as grief-stricken as she was, happily agreed to look after little Flora. I was really grateful to her for that. “In the end, I had to let our flat go—it was too painful to stay in a flat that held so much happy memories in the midst of my pain. I never got rid of the feeling that Flora would walk through the door. Now, 10 years on, I still think of her every day. What with little Flora looking like her mother as she grows older. I have since remarried with two little boys. My wife agreed to have two children as three are all we prayed for in our family. Little Flora lives with us now and I’m secretly glad that there is no other daughter in the family to share the affection I have for her. I love my wife of course, but the love I feel for her is nothing like the one I shared with Flora.”

 Read more at https://toykam.blogspot.com.ng/2018/02/nows-time-to-give-your-love-life-make.html

Samsung launches new S9 phone with augmented reality features

Samsung unveiled its new flagship smartphone on Sunday with a focus on augmented reality features as it seeks to keep its title as the world’s biggest smartphone maker.

The South Korean firm showcased the Galaxy S9 on the eve of the official start of the Mobile World Congress in Barcelona, which comes after a year of flat smartphone sales.

With no other major handset maker using the annual event, the world’s largest phone show, to launch a new flagship device this year, Samsung had the opportunity to grab the spotlight.

The S9 features essentially the same design as last year’s previous flagship, with the full screen and curved glass edge of the S8, which was followed by Apple’s iPhone X and others.

But it includes louder sound, a faster processor and software that turns selfies into animated emojis, which will appeal to consumers who are increasingly preferring to use their phones to send text messages rather than talking.

Samsung also included a dual lense camara on the Galaxy S line for the first time, which will improve low-light capture and enhance slow motion video, which is popular on social media.

A service powered by artificial intelligence (AI) allows users to point its camera to instantly translate a sign in a foreign language.

It is also one of the few flagship phones left that still comes with a standard headphone jack.

“Despite these incremental innovations, Samsung will have to smartly leverage its brand and marketing machine to correctly position the new smartphones to a target audience,” said Forrester analyst Thomas Husson.

Global smartphone sales fell by 6.3 percent in the fourth quarter due to slower than expected Christmas sales, according to research firm IDC.

Overall global smartphone sales for 2017 were virtually flat — down 0.1 percent at 1.47 billion units — as phone makers struggled to come up with innovations that encourage customers to upgrade their devices.

– Cost Concern–

Samsung suffered a humiliating recall of its Galaxy Note 7 device in 2016 after several devices exploded, but its Galaxy 8 smartphone was a consumer and critical success.

While it kept its lead over Apple as the world’s biggest seller of smartphones in 2017 with a 21.6 percent market share, up from 21.1 percent in the previous year, Samsung faces stiffer competition from Chinese rivals like Huawei and Xiaomi that offer cheaper handsets with many high-end features.

The S9 will sell for 859 euros ($1,055), a price which analysts warned could turn off many consumers.

While the S9’s camera is “markedly different” in quality from older smartphones that people already own “consumers may delay purchase because of rising flagship prices,” IHS Markit said in a research note.

“Samsung must work hard to market the benefits of these designs to counter negative pricing perception.”

Huawei unveiled a new laptop and tablet in Barcelona earlier on Sunday but will present its new flagship smartphone — the P20 — on March 27 in Paris.

Thomas said this will allow it to “fine tune its marketing message based on how the new Samsung S9 devices are perceived by consumers”.

Earlier on Sunday South Korea’s LG unveiled the V30S — an updated version of its flagship V30 smartphone launched six months ago — which features higher memory and artificial intelligence-based technologies that focus on photos and voice recognition.

More than 100,000 people are expected to descend on Barcelona for the annual show, which features driverless carmakers, social media giants and chip companies in addition to handset makers. 

How grief does excessive damage to your body

By: Bunmi Sofola 

From the moment my mother passed away at 76, in her own bed, after succumbing to a cruel disease that caused her years of suffering, I had been poleaxed with what I later came to understand were the lesser- known physical symptoms of grief,” said Ajoke, a 52-year old proprietress of a thriving primary and secondary school. She continued: “Heart palpitations, a constant burn inside my head began to present itself in a very real physical way.

“As the weeks went by, I watched the changes in my hair with a sense of detachment as grief crashed in. Not only did the grey strands double, then triple in number, but the hair itself seemed to be thinning and my scalp was beginning to show through. I am going grey and bald, I thought,. with disinterest, as I delved into the stash of snacks in the house – an increased appetite and unwillingness to curb it’s another side-effect, it seemed, of losing someone you love.


“Normally, I am a person who likes to take care of myself. I am not overly groomed, but I have been careful to disguise the ageing process. Yet I had no desire to correct the physical changes that were occurring after my mother’s death. My grey, thinning hair seemed a perfect metaphor for my loss of youth. It told me what I already knew; I was no longer a girl or even young. Having nursed my mother through the worst of times, I had at once become a grown-up, a wise woman. And it was only months later that I started to notice physical improvements. But there was still my greying hair. So I threw myself at the capable hands of my hairdresser – a small but significant nod to the urge to look after myself physically.

While my internal scars remain, my hair is a war wound, and wounds sometimes need a helping hand to heal”. What does grief really do to your body? According to experts, damages include:

• Hair changes: Grief is a severe emotional stress and can cause hair to thin or grey. “Grief can trigger an excessive release of hormones known as prolactin and melatonin in your hair that will disturb the normal growth cycle and cause more shedding than usual,” explains Dr. Bessam Forjo, medical director of Trichlogists. ‘’The same hormones can also affect the melanin, the pigment in your hair, and cause it to lose pigment so that it turns grey.” He likens the process to the excessive shedding after birth and says: “Again, in that instance, hormones cause a disruption of the normal growth cycle and a woman may lose over 1,000 hairs in a day compared to the usual 100. The good news is that once the sharp edge of the grief passes, the growth cycle resumes and the hair will grow back, usually about six to eight months after you first noticed the changes, although the loss of pigment will be permanent.” 

• Weight Loss/Gain: How grief affects appetite depends on the individual. “People deal with periods of sadness in different ways,” says nutritionist Charlotte Stirling-Reed. “I have worked with clients who aren’t interested in food or eating at all and those who turn to food for comfort and even use it as a punishment or distraction. If you are programmed from a young age that food is a way to help you feel better then this may get slightly out of control and lead to overeating and weight gain.” The key, says Charlotte, is to try to concentrate on eating nutrient – rich foods in smaller amounts. Fluids are also essential. Aim for six to eight glasses a day to maintain hydration. Water, tea and milk all count towards your fluid intake. Can’t Sleep: Sleep disturbances are one of the most common physical manifestations of grief. “We hear about it a lot,” says Helen Butlin, manager of the Cruse Bereavement Care Helpline. “Some people have nightmares or wake up and can’t get back to sleep again, raking over memories or feeling panicky about life without the person they’ve lost.” Helen believes it’s important to catch sleep when you can and take naps in the day if possible. “It’s essential to have as good sleep hygiene as possible – so keeping your bedroom quiet and dark, having a bath beforehand if that relaxes you and not looking at any screens before bed. There’s no time limit to grief and sometimes you’ll feel OK for a bit and be able to sleep and then you’ll feel worse again and that is totally normal. Reduced 
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• Immunity: It is common for people who are grieving to find themselves more susceptible to illness and colds. “Grief can cause an excessive production of the stress hormones adrenaline and coortising – which will impact on your white cell count reducing its efficiency in the fight against infections,” says Dr. Imran Raft, Chair Research at the Royal College of Practitioners. Doctors will take your grief into account when assessing any illness but should not ignore the possibility that anything else might be wrong too. 

• Itchy Skin: It’s not unusual to have skin flare-ups after suffering a loss. “There is correlations and stress,” says dermatologist, Dr. John Ashworth. If you get psoriasis for the first time which presents as flaky crusty patches of skin or utricaria – a raised itchy rash – within a month, say, of a stressful event, then causation would seem reasonable. Grief can also make a current skin condition worse. If you already have eczema or are prone to cold sores, then it’s very possible you could see an exacerbation of these at a time when you’re stressed or lacking sleep,” concludes Dr.. Ashworth, who reiterates the importance of being vigilant with taking skin medication when you’re recently bereaved. Palpitations! These are common in periods of stress. ‘’The increase of adrenaline and cortisol in your body will cause your blood pressure to rise and may lead to chest pain or your heart pumping irregularly,” explains Dr. Rafi. Occasionally, a doctor will prescribe beta blockers – which decrease activity of the heart by locking the actions of hormones such as adrenaline- on a short-term basis to help reduce blood pressure and palpitations. This is normally done as a last resort, after encouraging patients to try relaxation techniques first. Helen Butlin from Cruse recommends the following ‘grounding technique’ for anxiety and heart palpitations. “When your heart’s pumping irregularly or you’re feeling panicky, put your feet on the floor and practise deep breathing in and out to help feel in the moment and to connect you with your physical surroundings. This helps to reduce anxiety and calm you down.” 

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• Fatigue: Sometimes, after the loss of a loved one, there can be an overwhelming lethargy. “When you feel a loss of the meaning of life, it can feel difficult to rustle up any motivation says Helen Butlin. “We encourage people to take small, positive steps. Go for a short walk, text someone, make phone call. Any little thing is a step towards feeling like you have a sense of purpose again. Be sure to look after yourself too. Eat well, get outside for some fresh air and even watch a TV show that you always enjoyed. Doing the things you always liked to do before may slowly reconnect you with joy, re-ignite your motivation and give you more energy.”

https://toykam.blogspot.com.ng/2018/02/nows-time-to-give-your-love-life-make.html 

LIMING: HOW TO IMPROVE SOIL pH.

There are various factors that determine the success of any crop cultivation. Part of them is the soil pH. Soil pH is the degree or amount of acidity or alkalinity of a soil. It is important and highly recommended that farmers test the pH of their soil before planting. Different crops have individual pH preference; some crops are acid tolerant while others are not. In order to put the round peg in the round hole, that is, knowing the type of crop to plant on a particular land, testing of soil pH is highly recommended.

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Soil pH scale ranges from 0-14; having 7 as the neutral point. Any value below 7 means the soil is acidic while above 7 means the soil is alkaline in nature. Most crops thrive best at pH value 6.5-7.5. When a soil has a low pH, that is, acidic; it can be corrected. One of the methods of correcting low soil pH is liming.

So what is liming?
Liming is the act of applying some material, usually calcium and magnesium containing material, to neutralize or correct the soil pH to a favorable level for crop growth and development. In other words, liming is the process of adding liming materials to the soil to raise the soil pH, thus, enhancing crop growth. Liming is a traditional procedure in preparing soil for planting. Materials used in liming process are called liming materials; they are usually calcium and or magnesium rich compounds. What liming materials do is to reduce the acidity of the soil, thus, raising the soil pH to a more favorable level.


Examples of liming materials that can be used to correct your soil pH are:

• Calicitic Aglime: It is a ground Limestone containing mainly calcium carbonate.
• Dolomitic Aglime: It is a ground limestone containing a mixture of calcium carbonate and magnesium carbonate. 
• Slaked lime: It is composed of calcium hydroxide or a mixture of calcium and magnesium hydroxide. 
• Quicklime: It comprises of calcium oxide or a mixture of calcium and magnesium oxide. 
• Marl: It is a deposit of calcium carbonate derived from mollusk shells, usually mixed with silt and clay. 
• Wood ashes

These are the commonly used liming materials. Another important aspect of liming is the effectiveness of the liming material. The fineness of the liming material determines the effectiveness of the liming material; the finer the liming material the more effective and greater the neutralizing activities of the liming material. Hence, fine liming material should be selected ahead of granulated ones.

How to apply liming material to soil
Getting a good and effective liming material is a lofty prerequisite to successful control of the soil pH. The mode of application also contributes greatly to the success of this practice. The best way to apply liming material to soil is through broadcasting. You must ensure you broadcast the liming material evenly on the soil such that the liming material surfaces on virtually all corners and spots on the plot. This can be done using a spreader on a large farm or manually using farm labor.

If this is properly done, the pH of your soil should be adjusted within 2 weeks. Alternatively, you can apply the liming material on strips or borders of the plot. What matters is getting the liming material on your farm and it does its job perfectly.

When all necessary pre-planting operations are carried out as required, farming will be very lucrative and profitable than we envisaged. Doing the necessary practices rightly is a prerequisite to the success of any business.

Now’s time to give your love-life a make-over!

By Bunmi Sofola

Now the year has fully taken off, I thought readers should revamp their sex life (if indeed it needs revamping!) by following these experts’ top tips on how to keep the spark in your relationship.

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Lead separate lives: Try to think of your partner as independent from you— you’re not joined at the hips. Imagine them at work, playing a sport or doing something well without you. See them as the vital and interesting individual they are when they’re not with you. This is far sexier than the claustrophobic familiarity that can kill attraction when all you see is the socks left on the floor and your partner slumped on the sofa. Learn to read secret signals: If your relationship is full of hostility, you won’t have a good love life. Your anger is a barrier to enjoying sex. You have to resolve conflict, don’t bottle things up. Ask him: “Can we talk about it?” Solve the problem, then you’ll be able to enjoy each other. Everyone has their favourite things in the bedroom—whether it’s having their ears nibbled or their feet tickled. But they’re almost always too embarrassed to tell. So how do you discover your partner’s fantasies? Look at what they’re doing to you! For example, someone who loves having their ears nibbled with nibble on their partner’s ears. Pay attention to your man’s moves and you’ll get an idea of what he wants you to do to him. – Kate Taylor, relationship expert Don’t worry, be happy: These days, sex is just another lifestyle product and another way for people to make money by selling us things we don’t want or need. But you don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations. A good sex life is one that makes you feel happy and comfortable, whether you’re doing it ten times a week or ten times a year, it’s quality not quantity that counts. When you make love, focus on your partner’s pleasure, not on your own. The better you are as lovers, the more enjoyable they’ll get from sex and the more likely they open up and tell you what they require. Do they want more foreplay? Are you picking the wrong time for sex? Suggest that you bathe together or give them a massage first. Ask for feedback during sex and give them time to become aroused. – Tracy Cox, sex expert. Hit the spot: Strip naked together and take it in turns to run your hands slowly over your partner’s body, loving it for every wrinkle, fold and flaw. As you do so, tell them what makes them sexy. Remember a time when you had great sex and talk about it.

GUIDE ON BUILDING A MODERN POULTRY HOUSE

Housing is very important in poultry farming; its main function is protection, from adverse weather conditions and predators. These two factors are great threats to the productivity of the poultry birds. Building a modern poultry house has strategies and approaches for it to enhance the productivity of the birds.

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Many poultry businesses fold up today as a result of the ignorance of the farmer. It is very possible you feed your birds with highly nutritious feed, serve fresh clean water and follow a strict medical program yet have a poor production. Productivity of birds does not only lie on the nutrition and health program alone; environmental factors also play a germane role on the productivity of poultry birds. Your poultry house is the interphase between your birds and the environment; hence, poultry house should be constructed such that it compensates the welfare of the birds.

There are different types of poultry house and several factors have to be considered in building a poultry house. A poultry house should be constructed bearing in mind the effects of some environmental factors, such as: heat, rainfall etc.; a good poultry house must abate the effects of these environmental factors. Here are some guides you should follow when constructing a modern poultry house.

• Orientation of the house:

Did you know there is a way you must position your poultry house to enhance their productivity and make the birds very comfortable? Yes, there is. The longest side of your pen, that is, the breadth, should face the direction of the prevailing wind. This has several advantages. The most cogent advantage that your birds receive is even ventilation. Also, moisture dries up easily in such poultry house. Ventilation is very important in poultry farm. It eliminates heat stress and makes the bird comfortable, thus, enhancing their productivity. One of the ways to ensure good ventilation in a poultry house is it orientates the poultry house in the direction of the prevailing wind. For you to know the direction of the wind, just throw up a kite and watch where it moves to up the sky, alternatively, set up a small fire watch the direction of the smoke or hold a strand of thread in the air and watch the direction it orientates to. This is one of the factors to consider before setting up a poultry house.

Materials used in poultry house:
The materials you use in the construction of your poultry house depend on your financial strength. Poultry house can be made with different materials but you have to bear the purpose of the house in mind. The most prominent purpose is protection, from harsh weather and predators. Ensure any material you will use serves this purpose duly.




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• Ventilation:

Ventilation is very important in a modern poultry house. There are several biological processes going on in a poultry house that tends to generate heat; ventilation serves two purposes: elimination of heat stress and drying up of moisture in the poultry house. Heat stress is very detrimental to poultry birds; it can reduce the productivity of birds greatly and also cause death in severe cases. Also, moisture in a poultry house is not good for the well-being of the birds. Moisture provides a favorable condition for disease pathogens to thrive, thus, causing disease outbreak in the farm. Ventilation is the principal solution to these threats; proper ventilation eliminates the heat in the farm and also dries up moisture. The poultry house must be designed in a way that is well ventilated.

• Planting of tree crops:

Trees are beneficial entities to humans, especially those that bear edible fruits. However, deforestation is one of the banes of environmental pollution the world today. Trees are not only good for man; they are as well beneficial to animals. Trees provide fresh air and also bring a cool sensation to animals. Planting a tree around your poultry house makes your birds healthy, eliminates heat stress, provides a cooling effect and shields your birds from harsh weather condition. You can plant tree crops like banana, plantain, orange, mango, etc.; although some of these trees may harbor some pest. This can be controlled with proper security measures, use of repellants etc.

• Protection from predators:

Predators can be micro, in form of bacteria, fungi and others, or macro, in form of snakes. All these can be controlled biologically; there are pest repellants crops you can plant to keep macro predators away from your farm. Also, use of biosecurity is very important, it eliminate the emergence of micro predators; these are very destructive.

• Litter material:

In our homes, we have carpets and rug to adore the floor, so also in a modern poultry house, litter material serves this purpose too. Litter materials are placed on the floor of the pen to absorb moisture from the birds’ droppings, facilitate easy cleaning and also make the birds comfortable. Wood shaving is the common litter material used, others are groundnut husk, newspaper for chicks etc. do not use saw-dust; its small particle size can enter the birds’ eyes and make them blind or cause a respiratory disease.
All the aforementioned guides must be implemented to achieve success in the poultry business. Feeding alone does not determine the success of a poultry farm; these are structural and environmental aids to poultry birds. 

POULTRY FEED ADDITIVES: 8 NATURAL MATERIALS THAT GIVE BRIGHT YELLOW EGG YOLK

Non-nutritional components of poultry diet are called poultry feed additives. They are added to poultry feeds to improve feed performance and animal well-being. Poultry feed majorly contains cereal and legumes; these two components take larger percentage, like 95%, of the feed formulation. Others are vitamins and minerals; they all play significant roles in poultry well-being.

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Feed additives in animal nutrition usually take very small percentage, less than 1%, of the feed composition. They are meant to improve the performance of the animal through boosting the immune system and protecting the animals from various infections. There are different examples of feed additives for poultry, they are: antibiotics, antioxidants, pigmenters etc.; in this article, we shall discuss pigmenters and their relevance in poultry nutrition.

Pigmenters are examples of feed additives for poultry that enhance the quality of the chicken’s egg yolk color. Egg yolk colors are almost completely dependent on the feed served; yolk color is one of the internal qualities of an egg, egg with bright yellow yolk is more preferred to egg with orange or pale color yolk.
The bright yellow color of the yolk is due to the presence of xanthophyll pigment in the diet. It can be sourced naturally or artificially, depending on the preference of the farmer. Yellow maize is a good source of xanthophyll pigment in poultry diet.


Take a look at this:

Yellow maize contains this pigment; when fed to poultry birds, it gives the yolk a bright yellow color. But wheat does not have this pigment. Hence, the use of wheat in poultry diet requires the inclusion of pigmenters as additives to ensure the bright yellow color is achieved.

Poultry feed additives are classified into two; namely:

• Natural or organic feed additives 
• Artificial or synthetic feed additives.

The natural poultry feed additives are those ones that are naturally present in feedstuff, like the presence of xanthophyll in yellow maize. If this maize is used as a whole source of energy in poultry diet, then, inclusion of pigmenter in the feed may not be necessary. However, if other energy feedstuff like wheat is used, then pigmenters can be added to the feed.

Synthetic feed additives are those materials developed to improve the performance of the diet and animal fed. They are the real feed additives. They are not sourced in the feedstuff but synthesized in the laboratory and certified for animal use. Example of synthetic pigmenter is canthaxanthin. This can be added to poultry diet to improve the egg yolk color.

However, people are becoming more conversant with what they consume. Everyone craves organic nutrition; as an organic poultry farmer, instead of adding the synthetic pigmenters to your poultry diet, you can add any of the below material as various researches have proven that they have pigmenting property in them. They are:

• Sunflower Petals 
• Marigold leaves 
• Alfalfa 
• Orange peels 
• Algae 
• Carrot 
• Annatto Seed 
• Chili pepper.

These are examples of feed additives for poultry with the ability of enhancing a bright yellow color in egg yolk. They are natural and have no side effects; unlike the synthetic ones that tend to have residual effects upon consumption. These materials are applied in dried form with no limitation since they are organic in nature. They give better yolk color compare to the synthetic ones.